There are Two Constants in my life the past two years:

Traffic and Internet Poker …and both can make or break my day by themselves. Some days all three can either leave me a bald, naked, shivering in the corner or turn me into the most confident, omniscient, feel-good person to walk the earth.

My commute to work from my house is Total Est. Time: 38 minutes (with no traffic of course) Total Est. Distance: 29.98 miles (let’s just say 30 miles). It can take me 40 minutes (when there is no traffic due to summer or holiday situation with any traffic) to 1 hr. and 45 minutes if there is really bad traffic (those days don’t happen often but when they do…LOOK OUT!). People have told me that the traffic in Southern California is worse but I can’t see how much more worse it could be. Some people have also chimed in with “Why don’t you just get a job closer to home?”…ya know, with that holier than thou sarcastic tone and with a scrunched-up ‘I’m constipated’ look on their face. I’ve tried people! I can’t find a job closer to home that pays nearly the same (I’m a Tech. Support/Systems Admin. Dinosaur from-the-late-90’s). I survived a business that folded and the tech. sector of that company was subsequently sold to a stock market/software billionaire) so take that sarcastically toned voice and constipated looking face and….well you know…

Internet Poker….I started like everybody else…losing money. I actually played the “play” money accounts first and then grew tired of playing for nothing. I’ve been playing cards my whole life so that was a given that I would eventually gravitate towards internet poker. I also work with computers and software everyday so that was also an avenue that led me to internet poker. Not to mention that it’s too hard to get your friends together for home games on a regular basis especially when we all have kids. I started to study the game somewhat intensely by playing online and reading the standard bibles of poker. Soon thereafter I started winning (and also learned to avoid the potholes of poker) as long as I played when I wasn’t tired or in some sort of tilt-inducing frame of mind. Playing online poker is a way for me to escape my day job and the daily grind. Then you realize that there is another kind of grind. The online poker grind…..Traffic/Overwhelming Table selection, Crashes/Bad Beats, Flow/of the game you’re playing, and Speed/Running over the table…getting run-over. They all exist whether you are in traffic or if you participate in an online poker game of your choice.

Traffic begins and ends the workday so that may have more of an effect my disposition than Poker….but there are many similarities.

Traffic-You will be happy for the most part to get to work when you can fly into work unimpeded.
Online Poker-You are happy to multi-table or participate in the next level of Ring-Game, SNG, STT, and MTT when you can run over the current table/tourney.
Traffic-You can get stuck in the worst traffic ever and there is nothing you can do about it….or you can take the road less-traveled and it may take longer to get there but at least you’ll be moving.
Online Poker-You can plod along a certain bankroll to limit ratio to build bankroll or come up with a different plan/route to build bankroll (a mix of different levels, game selection, ring games and tourneys etc).
Traffic-You can increase your comfort level by getting a certain type of car with certain amenities to make your ride more comfortable (CD player, air-conditioning etc.) or drive that cold/leaky Jeep that you got because you thought that it made you look cool.
Online Poker-You could buy your dream Laptop/PC/19” flat-screen LCD/Wireless Router/wireless network card….all the bells and whistles!! Play anywhere in the house and watch TV/exercise etc. while playing poker or stick with that old/slow desktop PC attached to a cable like a ball and chain in your extra room/office.
Traffic-You can get into a fight with some Road Rage freak with an attitude/agenda…or you could let the freak kill the next guy that buys into his intimidation act.
Online Poker-You can get into a Chat/Rage/Type incident with the guy that just drew a 1-outer on your aces at the river (It’s happened to us all hasn’t it…if it hasn’t you’re probably lying)…or you could accept the fact that there will inevitably be bad-beats and lucky draws no matter how much of a favorite you are.

And here is the obligatory “Don’t Do” list

Don’t Drive or Play online Poker while:

1. Tired and/or sick.


2. Drunk (I have to admit I love to drink when I play online poker but It’s pretty rare that I don’t know what’s happening or that I’m not concentrating).


3. Talking on the phone. Besides the fact that it pisses off the most tolerant of drivers.( I’ve had emergency phone calls and the like while I was deep into a tourney and I quickly lost concentration….you’re better off choosing the “Deal me out” button…believe me!)


4. Watching TV/Movie…not concentrating on the game in front of you whether it is high stakes driving or high stakes poker. (I am also guilty of this because of my wireless router and laptop PC that makes it so easy to sit down and play in front of the boob tube…but I tend to concentrate on the poker especially since it involves winning or losing a huge pot).


5. Thinking about something else…again you have to pay attention or you’ll pay for it with your life/bankroll.


6. Your child/pet is sick or in need of attention….I’m not equating a cat to your most precious of creations like a child but some people do. I have both so I found out the hard way (What was I thinking?...but then again I know that many other people have dealt with this issue one way or another).


7. You are extremely pissed-off (HAHA….Who hasn’t done that!). You’ll find out quickly that you will become more pissed-off.


8. Get OUT of my way while I’m late for work and/or trying to get past the dumb-ass that rear-ended the other dumb-ass that jacked his brakes because he wasn’t paying attention….OR…. I’m on your table in an online poker ring-game, SNG, STT, or MTT!! OK!….LMAO!….LOL!